Have you been trying to lose weight/diet by exercising obsessively and avoiding high calorie (read: delicious) food? Are you still fat despite all that???
Well, I’ve discovered 3 excellent weight loss tips over the years.
I’m a size S/XS for all my clothes and my waistline is 23.5 inches so whatever I’m saying has been proven to work… For me at least. To boot, I actually have breasts (C32A thankyouverynice) and I can still run a 2.4km distance under 11 and a half minutes. [i.e. I’m not a sack of bones.]
The 3 things that I’ve found helps me lose weight (Like, a LOT of weight):
1 Food Poisoning (diarrhoea/vomiting or both)
2 A breakup (hasn’t happened in 5 years, thankfully)
3 Living in Vietnam. (Go figure.)
Try it! It has been proven to work.
Good luck ! ((((;
Disclaimer: This blog, the author and it’s contents will not be held responsible in anyway for all breakups, health or mental debilitations resulting from deliberate ingestion of spoilt or rotting food and substances otherwise unsuitable for consumption as stated by AVA, FDA and other quality control agencies.
I am a tree.
Rings are forming inside of me, circling episodes that need correction
Red ink circles- brazenly drawn with a teacher’s hand
And I am growing, flowering with the season after the coldest, most bitter winter I have endured in this leafy life.
I will soon form fruit, and the seeds, I will disperse across the land
My seeds will stick to the fur and wings of oblivious creatures
They will briefly be drawn to my sweet, succulent fruit-
Or the bright, alluring colours of my influorescences- a deception to have my bidding specifically done.
I will give a part of myself away to these many passers by
Because how else can I live?
I need to give a bit of myself away since the day you left
The day you decided that you did not need
The sweet and succulent fruit of my body
The flowers of my constant desire to make you happy
The leaves of my evergreen attempts to shelter and protect you
The deepest, strongest roots of my love for you, watching you lie against me in the moments of your slumber.
They are still there, together with the imprint of your head against it, just the way I remember in the dead of night, when I would watch your chest gently rise and fall
And you would often mumble in your sleep- the mysteries of your complex and beautiful mind- in a language I could not understand
The roots have grown deep into the ground, and I cant live without them. They have made me what I am.
You left me.
And now I am but a tree with no purpose but to live, grow and propagate
And do that I shall
A bit of me in every seed, contained within it, a hope that I might live again with every visitor that comes to enjoy my offerings
Often they find that the seeds are poisoned
They are allergic to my sap
They cannot tolerate the toxins in my fruit.
And I die many little deaths
With time, these only accumulate while meanwhile I am
Wishing quietly that you would return
To enjoy the flowers, fruit and seeds and all of me
That was only ever meant for you and you alone.
~ For A; This is what I am without you.